A bedtime story from uncle Ibrahim…

A long while ago in a faraway land, there existed a beautiful garden. It had the prettiest flowers on earth ,lovely singing streams , lush green meadows and trees kissing the clouds. And this garden was inhabited by exotic animals and birds of every kind.

What made this garden unique was a very old tree that stood in its very midst. The tree gave blossoms all around the year, as if spring was forever in its old heart. And it gave the sweetest fruits, the aroma and taste of which stood unparalleled in all worlds….

Beasts of every land and clime would visit this garden to feast on these heavenly fruits. Be it summer or winter, day or night, the garden would be bustling with activity, abuzz with seekers from every corner of the earth.

Now the land around this magical tree was owned by a group of pure bred horses, a very powerful and strong herd of animals who ruled the area with a tight hoof. They demanded heavy compensation from the seekers for getting access to the tree. Fearing their wrath, every one obliged and as seasons passed, the herd became the unchallenged masters of the garden. As their power increased, so did their tyranny. They enslaved other animals in the garden and forced them to slog for them. They broke every rule that were passed down to them from earlier generations. The garden eventually became a haven for a privileged few who lorded over the helpless downtrodden.

In these troubled times, their lived a caterpillar who was extremely pained by the oppression around him. He was always trying his bit to help his poor brothers. He would often try to dissuade the aggressors, but to no avail. Since he was the epitome of love and care, he was adored by all the embattled animals and birds in the garden.

Once in a while, this caterpillar would perch itself on a shrub and ponder over the sad state of things. He would remember the rules about kindness and love that he had heard from his parents and would eagerly dream of a time when oppression would end and all animals would live together in peace and harmony.

On one such occasion, as he was musing intensely about his lost garden, he found himself getting surrounded by a shroud. Greatly Alarmed by this, he tried pushing his way out. But the shroud kept pressing itself on him until he was fully covered by it.

Summer changed to autumn…. Winter came along and then the icy winds gave way to the first signs of spring.

And one fine day, the shroud cracked and there came out a being that was never ever seen in those parts of the world. He wore a cloak that resembled the rainbows that occasionally flashed across their skies. His cloak had every lovely color any garden could boast of and when he flashed his wings…. There spread all around him, the glow of a million dewdrops and the scent of every flower in the valley.

As all the animals and birds of the garden came out in amazement, the butterfly flew to the top of the magical tree and announced at the top of its voice…..

“My fellow beings…. Listen to me. I bring to you tidings from the one who has created this garden. Obey his rules and stop all oppression. A day will come when this whole garden will be destroyed and each of us will be judged according to our actions. And then the best of us will inherit forever a garden greatly better than the one we have and the worst amongst us will be doomed to live in pits of pain and misery”

The horses and their accomplices laughed at the butterfly. They scoffed and ridiculed him for his ignorance and audacity. But some of the oppressed ones were so relieved by his speech that they looked at him in awe, relishing every single word. The minds of some of the oldest animals in the garden seemed wholly taken up with reminiscences of past tales told by their forefathers on how a similar being had come into their world and had changed it for good.

The butterfly fluttered all around the garden spreading his message. With every flash of his lovely wings, the number of his detractors and supporters grew. But all his detractors were from the strong and powerful and his supporters from the weak and oppressed.

Finally the horses started getting threatened. They unleashed a reign of terror on the being and his followers. Many animals and birds were wantonly killed. But they kept on spreading their message without fighting back. As the oppression became unbearable, the butterfly decided to move out of the garden and fly away to another grove far away from his own.

In this new glade, the they created a world that respected all the age old rules of the garden . Every animal and bird , big and small, lived in harmony, loving and caring for one another and spending their time worshipping the gardener.

The horses and their accomplices couldn’t sit idle. They repeatedly attacked the grove. But every time, they had to retreat, greatly humbled. Though they were vastly outnumbered the butterfly and his companions resisted the onslaughts and won each time….

As time passed, the grove began to swell with believers. With every passing day, beasts from every land came flocking to him. And one day, all these animals and birds set out to reclaim the garden from where they were expelled.

The horses gave up without a fight , seeing the sheer strength of the being’s companions.

The butterfly took over the magic tree and changed all the oppressive rules for ever. All the horses and their accomplices were forgiven. They gratefully accepted the being as their leader and they all went on to live happily ever after……in peace with each other and their gardener.

Years passed….. The being, his companions and their descendants were all buried under the sands of time. Rules were broken again… Oppression raised its head again. Though a small herd of animals still held on to the rules, they were vastly outnumbered. Tyranny and anarchy reigned.

One day the earth shook. Trees tumbled. Springs overflowed…… Cracks appeared in the meadows, hills overturned and before sun set the whole garden was completely reduced to rubble…

Whether a long time passed… or a short spell… no one knows… but all the birds and animals found themselves awakened from their slumber. And they stood facing their gardener… and at his side was the butterfly.

The oppressors were dragged into dungeons of misery and pain…. doomed forever.

And the ones who followed the being were lead gracefully to a garden, the likes of which they could never have imagined.

Good Night…….And may you inherit that garden… one day

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One of the most enthralling movies I have ever seen….

Racing Stripes is the title. It’s an old movie, released in 2005 (5 years is a long time now a days, isn’t it?). I watched it on HBO the other night and man!!!!! It was really inspiring… Truly, life changing if one manages to read its message without getting lost amidst the cute graphics, slapstick situations and a catchy background score.

The protagonist is a zebra who was abandoned (accidentally perhaps) by a travelling circus that is rescued by a retired race horse trainer. (Forgive me for not including names in the narration… remembering them have never been my forte). The trainer brings him home, to an ailing and semi neglected farm inhabited by a wonderful bevy of talking animals. His co inhabitants try their best to make him comfortable and acclimatize him to the easy life in the farm. One day he casually happens to see the Race course that runs alongside the border of the farm. He gets quite excited, seeing the galloping horses, the drive of the Jockeys, flash of the camera bulbs, din and the bustle and the thumping excitement of thorough bred horse racing. The poor thing believes that he is one of them convinces himself that he is destined to be a race winner. Very soon, he takes to racing full time around the farm. He even races against the mailman, the flock of visiting birds and even the young foals practicing on the other side of the fence.

His enthusiasm catches the fancy of the trainer’s daughter whose greatest ambition was to become a jockey. But she was strongly forbidden from riding as her mother had died in a racing incident- the tragic event that had led to the Trainers retirement and his self imposed exile from the course. The young girl and the zebra form a team and they start training together. The trainer comes to know eventually and though he tries his best to stop them, their enthusiasm finally wins him over.

Lot of things happens in quick succession. An old race track gambler sees the duo practicing and comes over to support the team. The thorough breeds, threatened by the progress shown by the zebra across the fence tell him what he really was and convinces him that a clumsy Zebra can never win against race horses. Though our hero gets totally de motivated and almost gives up, his friends come together to convince him that he has a winner’s heart and that was all that mattered, when it comes to winning and losing. Braving direct attacks by the horses and the jeers and insults of the race course authorities, the zebra- girl team gets into the race….

In a nerve racking heart thumping climax that takes up almost 20 minutes… the duo, beating all odds , challenges and even foul play by the competitors, go on to win the prized trophy. The last scenes had me sitting at the edge of the sofa, biting my nails and cheering loudly as “Racing stripes” crosses the finishing line first.

A wonderful movie…. It’s more convincing than any book or training (even mine… ha ha). Tells us that though genes and pedigree matter… attitude and hard work matters more… and with the heart of a winner, even a clumsy zebra can outperform any thorough bred…. Any day…

Don’t miss this movie and watch it with your kids….

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Life is/in an Elevator

A man stays on the 45th floor of a skyscraper. But every time he wants to go up, he presses the button for the 15th floor and then takes the stairs all the way till his floor. can u explain Why ?
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Well…. hmmm….. he was a midget and hence couldnt reach the button for the 45th floor.
I am really sorry to throw this P.J at you. I heard this one in school and havent forgotten it due to its sheer “poorness”.

But Alhamdulillah, all of us are full blown adults. Yet, we deliberately choose to press low lying and easily reachable buttons in the elevators of life. We simply dont dare to press the ones that are higher up, slightly above our reach. Those that demand a little stretching. Every day we see people who have risen up just because they have done just that. But we attribute their success to luck, “Wasta” or “the silver spoons that they were born with…”

Life is just like an elevator. It takes you where you want it to take you. Sometimes it brings you down instead of up. But you dont have to get down at the ground floor and stay there for ever. Consider that as a free ride and wait for the next opportunity to jump in and press the top most button.

And flash your best smile always , make small talk with your co travellers and be courteous…. Make sure that you hold the door ajar for all those lovely ladies. But also make sure that you dont miss the bus….

And most importantly, never forget that life is as brief as any elevator ride and what u do in that brief sojourn decides whether you reach the terrace amidst the clouds or the basements filled with muck…….

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He who angers you conquers you…..

I am pretty sure that you wouldn’t disagree with the title of my post. If a teeny weenie child does something that doesn’t feature in your list of acceptable behaviors…. would you allow hot steam to gush out of your ears ? I doubt it. But if the same thing is done by an adult who could match your biceps and triceps fiber to bulge….. it would be a different story altogether. And If the offender fits in the heavyweight and you are in the featherweight category, it would be a third story. I am not suggesting that Anger is a bad thing. Getting angry at the right person for the right purpose to the right degree at the right time is indeed a very good thing. But we often do just the opposite.

Some of the typical things that I have seen Homo sapiens (Including myself) do are… Screaming/Throwing things/Hitting people/Cursing/Banging ones head

To make a long list short, let me put it this way. Anger isn’t bad. But Aggression during anger is….And this behavior comes from the same instinct that our forefathers who lived in the jungles once had. They used to paint their faces red and plant bones and plumes into their unwashed hair, to scare potential opponents away. So even today we try the same antics… this just proves that Aggression is really fear in disguise. So if you scream at your wife, it is another way of telling her that you are scared of her. I am sure that my loyal male readers would scoff at this suggestion. Come on, let us be honest. Fearsome lions we are for sure. But inside our dens, it’s another story…

Sick jokes apart, Medical research tells us that a person with continual episodes of anger has a five-time greater chance of dying before age 50. Divorces, Job losses, broken ties and relationships….. In other words, ANGER is just one silly letter away from DANGER.

Allah’s Messenger said: “The strong is not the one who over comes people by his strength. But the strong is the one who controls him while in anger.”

God promises Jannah to those to repress anger….The holy Quran says….

“And march forth in the way to forgiveness from your Lord, and for a Paradise as wide as the heavens and the earth, prepared for the righteous; those who spend in prosperity and in adversity, repress anger, and pardon men. Verily, Allah loves the good-doers-The Family of Imran Al ‘Imran Aya 134”

I am sure that you are all in perfect agreement with me so far. And all of you want to interrupt to tell me “THANKS FOR THE LECTURE. NOW TELL US- HOW ON EARTH CAN WE MANAGE OUR ANGER ?, especially since we run into million provocations of every hideous variety every day”

Well, there are many effective tools. Learning and applying Transaction Analysis is one of them (I will cover T.A in a subsequent post Insha allah). But today I want to introduce you to the Great Anger Log, a surefire way to become aware of your anger triggers and an even greater way to learn how to manage it. It’s a very simple tool..

Find a cozy corner, take a steaming cup of coffee and proceed to fill up this table. Take your own sweet time. Make sure that you cover the most frequent anger triggers and map your behavior to these (You will not be impressed). Then go on to rack your brains and come out with alternate ways of behaving non aggressively to each of these triggers. Just by doing this, you automatically program yourself sub consciously to remind you each time this trigger happens. And you will be surprised to find yourself responding differently.

Keep revisiting the log and adding on to it. In due course of time, you will find yourself deleteing entries as you would have taught yourself to respond gracefully to certain triggers…. Give it a try. It’s definitely worth the effort.

Let me leave you with this Saying of Prophet Muhammed (PBUH) about anger..

Allah’s Messenger said : a believer is never allowed to stay angry with his brother over three days, because if he who does that, he will go to hell (FIRE) . (This is reported by Abu Dawood)

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Bhakthi instead of Shakthi

So the verdict is finally out.

And how do I feel? The word “I” in the preceding sentence is stressed because I have taken the liberty to assume that I represent all educated, forward thinking Indian Muslim fundamentalists- deeply religious souls who abhor rabid communalism. If you want to know my interpretation of the difference between R &C, please read an earlier post.

Point 1:

The court says that the site is the birth place of lord RAM. Well, we all know that this cannot be proven empirically. However this has to be respected since millions of people believe it to be so. And beliefs are important. We believe that the sun will rise tomorrow. We believe that good will triumph over evil. We believe in our parentage without resorting to DNA tests. There is a slight discomfort since a court which has to go either by empirical data or circumstantial evidence has chosen to base the verdict on beliefs instead. This is really strange and I sincerely hope that it doesn’t set a precedent. But confusion notwithstanding, I reiterate… beliefs are important and must be respected.

Point 2:

The court says that the mosque was built after demolishing a temple. Well, even if the Archeological Survey of India has judged that a Massive Temple existed at that very site, it cannot be proven that the mosque was built by demolishing it. This is particularly confusing since there is ample documentary evidence to show that Babur, the invader generously patronized certain other temples and shrines. Yes, a Temple existed at the site. But No, there is no evidence to prove that it was demolished to build the mosque. If this was the case, the mosque would be an illegitimate structure built against the tenets of Islam and must be, by all means brought down. But In this particular case, I cannot say this with conviction. But let me; with lot of reluctance admit that the probability of that mosque being built after the demolishing of the temple does exist.

Point 3:

The court says that both Hindus and Muslims used to worship in the structure for ages, in different parts of the site though. This is a very comforting fact. Not so long before in time, we were able to enjoy our differences and seek solace in our respective concepts of godhood, side by side. It would have been so nice if we could have continued to do so…

So my Hindu brothers get 2/3rd of the site and the Muslim community gets 1/3rd. Though this is absurd from a legal standpoint for the obvious reasons stated above, I welcome the judgment since I believe that the end justifies the means in this particular case.

By accepting this judgment I get to…..

Respect the belief of my Hindu brothers

Feel good about my gracious beliefs particularly since I have chosen to accept the illegitimacy of the mosque based on a remote and very unlikely possibility

Go on a trip to Ayodhya and worship Allah standing next to a grand temple. By doing this I am sure that both the Muslim and Indian in me would be satisfied.

Feel safer since this verdict favoring my Hindu brothers has robbed the right wingers of a wonderful opportunity to create more mayhem and chaos. The problem will now shrink into its own self till it cannot be kindled further.

But let me also say this

The act of destroying the mosque in 1992 can never ever be condoned. It was a criminal act against the dictates of our democratic and secular system. The government of India must ensure that such acts don’t happen again… Never again… Nowhere.

There is no need for the Muslims to give away their 1/3rd share. It is their right granted to them by the legal system of the land. They should have a place of worship at that spot and must run it with the blessings of the local authorities and the temple administration. This is a definite challenge. But every Indian should work towards such an arrangement.

The building of the temple and the adjoining mosque must be done locally. No political party must make it a pan Indian affair by organizing rallies and meetings across the country. This will surely lead to inflamed passions and riots. Let the construction be a celebration of Bhakthi. Let it not degenerate into a vulgar display of Shakthi.

Let us all leave this incident behind and move on as soon as possible. We are stated to be the third largest economy by 2050. Let us equip ourselves to make the most of this boom. Let us all make our millions, share it with the have not’s and take our beloved country to greater heights…

I am sure that this will happen. My son and his friends were in the drawing room as the celebrated anchors in the various TV channels were excitedly dissecting the verdict. Despite the graphic pictures and the raised voices, neither Amaan, Rahul or Victor gave even one cursory glance towards it. They were too busy preparing for their upcoming exams…..

India has moved on….Alhamdulillah… Jai hind

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May Sense Prevail……

Tommorow afternoon, a court in India will give a verdict on a case that has evoked intense desctructive passions in our country for years…..

Please join me in uttering these few words in prayer…..

May Truth and Justice prevail……

If the (mosque) was indeed built after demolishing a (temple), may that land be given back to its rightful owners and may a splendid (temple) come up in its place. May closet and unborn (muslim) tyrants learn for good that the worship of (Allah) shouldn’t be enforced upon anyone. Least of all, by demolishing the place of worship of others.

May all (Muslims) succeed in accepting the truth and peacefully swallow their grief over the fall of the illegitimate (mosque). May their collective respect for the law and desire for peace dissuade anyone from venting their unjustified anger on innocents. May all the attempts of ones with cruel vested interests fail.

May everyone learn to leave this incident behind and get on with self, family, society and nation building.

To complete this prayer, please substitute the words in brackets with the following alternatives respectively…

(Makeshift Temple, Mosque, Mosque, Hindu, Ram, Hindus, Makeshift Temple)

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The Sheer Magic of NLP


Fear of Injections…… Cured in a Jiffy

Lack of interest in studies….. Fixed instantly

Getting stuck and immobilized in certain situations….. Freed immediately

Total Lack of Self Confidence…. Transformed within minutes

Sounds like the false promises of occult mediums and amulet vendors, doesnt it ? Not at all…

All these can be realised through an amazing technology of acheivement called NLP. I just got myself certified recently. There are certain things that are tough to learn, but easy to do. Driving is one example. Certain things are easy to learn but tough to do- Like digging a hole . Some other things are tough to learn and tough to do. Performing surgeries maybe. Finally you have things that are easy to learn and easy to do…. NLP is one such technology.

Towards the end of my post, I will recommend an excellent book on the subject. You can read it through in one sitting and then go on to change your and the lives of your loved ones in a twinkle….

But how does it work ?. It works on the premise that you can change your feelings by changing your thoughts. Through extensive research the founders of NLP have deduced that we think in terms of pictures, sounds, body physiology and self talk. “Feelings ” are not stored anywhere in our body. When something triggers a stimulus,- a thought about a Spider for example, our brain digs out pictures, sounds and self told narrations about spiders and then combines them with a particular body phsyciology (could be the way we arch our eye brows, or keep our fingers etc). This combination then goes on to trigger particular chemicals in our body that creates corresponding feelings. Some stimuli lead to feelings of pain, remorse, fear, regret etc etc and some others lead to happiness, ecstacy, excitement etc.

Now each of these ingredients have characteristics. Mental pictures have color, size, brightness, location etc. Similarly Sounds and Self talk have accents, pitches, locations and pace. Body postures can also be different. Through the tools of NLP one can bring up a particular feeling, analyse the ingredients causing it and then amazingly go on to change the feeling by changing the characteristics of the ingredients.

Like a master chef who can look into the cooking pot, add a few ingredients and change the dish forever, we can choose to disown all disempowering feelings. By working the other way around, we can also choose to generate empowering feelings of all kinds… all this and more within minutes.

Don’t take my word for it (Though I am a person who tries to make my video match my audio). Though there are hundreds of books on the subject, I highly recommend the book “Get the life you want” authored by Richard bandler, one of the co creators of NLP. You can get it here……

From Amazon

You can catch some awesome NLP videos on you tube. One of them can be found here…

On Youtube

You can digest the book within a few hours and then start implemeting the magic….. Trust me… You will be amazed and so will the world be….

So go ahead…. Make people’s lives worth living

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What is “being good” and why should I be so?


“A man’s ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties; no religious basis is necessary. Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear of punishment and hope of reward after death”

Thus Spake Albert Einstein…

This quote by one of the world’s most renowned physicists doesn’t solicit a rebuttal (defensive or otherwise) and isn’t open to any either. On the other hand we also don’t have to dignify this with an answer- Simply because of the fact that it isn’t from an authority on ethics or morality. We thank him immensely for giving us the theory of relativity. But no thanks for the frequent gibes he made at religions and believers in most of his works. Since his name will not feature in the list of the world’s top 10,000 philanthropists of his time, and since there are no striking examples of acts of virtue or tirades against vice in his life, we can afford to skip this quote and move on to be impressed and enthralled by his formula E= M(C*C). Moreover, he was a very vociferous racist who loudly, clearly and frequently supported the political agenda of the Zionists (what an irony it is – he doesn’t believe in the god of the Jews, but he wants to create a separate homeland for them by displacing millions of sons and daughters of the soil). So let us agree that we will admire beauty queens for their beauty and will imbibe more profound things only from people who are worthy of it….

But are we people who will simply walk away from an opportunity to spar with one of the most brilliant people ever to walk on this planet?- Neigh!!!!! So here we go…..

We fully agree that there are millions of people who live ethical lives without any religious basis. Proven research in Psycho technology teaches us that Man is programmed to maximize pleasure and minimize pain. So if someone chooses to live an ethical life, it’s simply because he has consciously or subconsciously linked intense pain to unethical acts and immense pleasure to ethical ones. This enables him to subordinate his animal instincts to higher causes. Yes. Mr. Einstein, This linkage can come from sympathy, education and social ties. Belief in the existence of a just and fair god combined with fear of punishment and hope of reward is another sure fire way to create this link.


When the US govt. decided to prohibit liquor in the early 20th century, their efforts failed miserably though the entire government machinery was used to enforce this. When the rule was finally revoked after people started dying by consuming spurious liquor, people including law enforcers got drunk and danced and slept on the roads for days.

When prophet Muhammad (SAW) announced the verses revealing the prohibition of liquor, people who were drinking threw their glasses out. People who had stocked it destroyed the barrels till all the gutters of Medina overflowed with liquor. People who had consumed liquor put their fingers in their throats and vomited it out. Real change was implemented without any force.

How was this possible?

For almost 13 years Prophet Muhammad (SAW) was preparing his community by repeatedly describing Heaven and Hell to them. All major Rules and regulations regarding Halal and Haraam were revealed only much after that. Through his discourses, he succeeded in creating in the hearts of his follower’s an intense longing for heaven and a repulsive abhorrence against hell. Once this was done, facilitating change was easy. When rules were enforced, people adopted them instantly.

Belief in accountability and payback is thus a very strong motivator. Delayed Gratification is the term giving to the act of sacrificing something at present for the prospect of receiving something better later. (Two chocolates in the evening instead of one right now. A trip to the park if you do the homework instead of watching TV). Psychologists deem this ability to delay gratification as a very healthy and mature trait.

Now why on earth should we consider someone who does this solely for the sake of god to be in a “Poor state”? As long as it motivates him to forsake evil and do well, why should he be considered inferior for expecting gratification, delayed nevertheless?

Why should we value judge his motive at all…..?. Sorry Mr. Einstein, we disagree….

Let’s take the debate a little backwards. How did the concepts of good and bad originate? It is proven that we can convince ourselves completely to justify any act that we do. So considering the relativeness of the two concepts, who defines what is absolute good or bad?

Study of savage tribes in Africa has proven that left to themselves, people define good and bad in terms of their convenience and favorable circumstances to survive. So in certain tribes stealing is taboo. But if the boys of that tribe have to be treated as men, they have to kill someone from any neighboring tribe. So they go and sneak around villages and chop of the heads of small children playing unattended. So much for sympathy and social ties.

When I used to travel outside the UAE with my colleagues for official reasons, I have seen many of my friends who are epitomes of morality succumb to the charms of the place. They come back and tell us “What happens away stays away”.

So we cannot teach ourselves absolute morality. That would be like a child guarding a packet of cookies. The society can’t either. Can education do it? Correct me if I am wrong… I didn’t find any references to morality in my physics, chemistry or history text books. If you have, please let me know.

I feel that absolute Morality that forces man to delay his gratification at the cost of his wants and desires and pleasures cannot come from man himself. It has to come from an outer source. Thus sheer logic tells us that the concepts of good and bad originated from a super natural course and that we came to know about them through his prophets….. I dont want to sound authoritarian here. Your comments are very much welcomed.

So we respect all agnostics and atheists who live ethical lives. And regardless of whether they acknowledge it or not, the true just god will reward them for that. We know the story about the prostitute who was promised heaven for taking pains to feed a thirsty dog. (Subuhanallah).

We are also convinced that some atheists do amazing acts of virtue. And they do so because they are conditioned by sources (Parents/ Reading etc) that may be non religious in their present context. But if we trace each of these sources back….. They will all surely lead back to him- The almighty god.

In other words all these atheists are true believers. The only thing is that they do not know it yet….

And for those who are convinced about the existence of god and divine retribution and still chooses to live unethical lives….. God Damn You!!!!!

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Motivation through Self Hypnosis


A buxom associate of mine and I got closeted in the lift together the other day. After sizing me up for a few seconds, he congratulated me excitedly and enquired – “Masha Allah Ibrahim! You seem to have lost lot of weight. How did you pull this off? “Disciplined living…..My friend”, I replied. “It’s time you took this track as well…” I went on to suggest in a patronizing tone. Before stepping out at his floor, he blocked the elevator door and sadly complained “I have tried all sorts of diets and exercise regimes. Though I start with a lot of enthusiasm, I just can’t stay put and I end up worse than before. You need to tell me the secret of your “discipline” ”.

A close relative who came home for EID was berating the utter unwillingness of her teenage son to put in the required hours of learning. “He spends all his time working on his fancy electronic projects. How wonderful would it be if he showed the same interest towards his school work”, she wondered.

Both the above incidents are typical case studies of Motivation or lack of it. Why do we find it so hard to do some things that others do effortlessly and happily? Why do we readily start and sustain certain things that some others vouch as absolutely incorrigible?

All these questions will lead us to two little cupboard racks in the inner store rooms of our mind. One of them is labeled “Pain”. The other is labeled “Pleasure”. All the things that we have to do on a daily basis are dumped into either of these racks. Every behavior of ours depends on the location of its storage. If I have stored “Relishing of Cheese cake” under pleasure and “Brisk walking for 30 minutes a day” under pain, you can rest assured that I will never ever exercise and will not lose any opportunity to raid the fridge. On the other hand, a body building enthusiast will have stored away “eating dessert” under pain and “lifting weights” under pleasure. No wonder he looks and feels the way he does.

Every time, we have to do something, our minds ask us this question- “Will this give me pain or pleasure?” We are all by default programmed to maximize pleasure and minimize pain. So all our actions depend solely on the name of the rack we have filed it under. As long as they stay there, no amount of coercing or cajoling from outside can motivate us to move an inch. Period.

So how can we acquire the internal motivation to do something that we don’t want to do? Simple!!!!- Just re- file the action. And voila!!!! Your life changes for the best.

“Come on! It cannot be so easy and quick”….You may be saying. Trust me. It’s that simple. Let me illustrate.

A smoker who have never been able to quit, kicks the deadly habit the instant his doctor takes a long hard look at his x ray and says- “If you touch one more cigarette, you are dead, my friend”. His years of puffing notwithstanding, he would stay miles away from cigarettes simply because the very thought of lighting up would induce intense and intolerable pain in him and the very thought of having well laundered lungs and a healthy life would gives him bursts of delight. He has gone through permanent change in an instant.

How can we use Pain and Pleasure to change our lives?

As an illustration, Let me advice my Buxom elevator companion.

He has to simply keep doing the following….

Keep reading without fail about the potential hazards of overeating. Read accounts of obese youngsters succumbing to heart attacks. Imagine the pain of undergoing surgery. Create mental pictures of a life devoid of all the sweet and yummy delights of life. See one self being ridiculed by others for resembling a well endowed pop corn seed. See one self living a life of scarcity, deprived of good health and happiness.

At the same time, visualize oneself as fit and healthy. Create vivid and compelling pictures of being admired by one and all. Meet and socialize with people who have bodies to die for. Paste pictures of role models with well toned bodies around. Imagine a life of health and happiness. Imagine the impact this would make on your loved ones. See yourself living a life of abundance, peace and contentment.

By alternating these inputs to ones brain consciously and relentlessly, you sub consciously facilitate a storage shift. Without even realizing it, you will start exercising regularly and will be surprised to see yourself decline the extra helping of that extremely enticing dessert.

Trust me. You will be amazed at the change. And it will be permanent because your mental closet is finally in order. Go ahead and try it. If you need any help, please feel free to call me on 050 3423552.

(The Pain and Pleasure concept can be found in more detail in Anthony Robbin’s bestselling book- Awaken the Giant within). Get it here From Amazon

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Two Must Have Skills….

In one of my earlier posts, I had written about the tremendous pace at which we are being flooded with new information. Knowledge on any given topic is said to be doubling every two years. This simply means that with farm fresh information becoming available so fast, we are all becoming obsolete at a rate of 50% every year, unless we locate ,internalize and apply this information. It goes without saying that in a world that is expecting MORE of the BETTER, QUICKER, being more knowledgeable than others is a definite competitive advantage.

Let me recommend to you two vitals skills that can equip you to Learn quite effectively. I have acquired these skills myself and can vouch for their ease of internalization. They can dramatically increase your knowledge (on any subject of your choice) by leaps and bounds, thereby making you much more valuable than your peers (who haven’t subscribed to this blog yet).

The first one is Speed Reading. It’s an amazing technique that teaches you how to triple your effective reading rate. ERR is the rate at which you can read and internalize. If you currently read at 80 words per minute and you remember 70% of it, your ERR is 56. By Learning Speed Reading you can increase it to 150 and beyond. I have seen people increase it even by 400 to 500%. Imagine being able to finish a report or book in just one fourth the time that you usually take.

The second is Accelerated Learning Techniques. Each of us have a preferred learning style. We are either Visual, Auditory or Kinesthetic Learners. Moreover each of us are endowed with varying degrees of the 7 different intelligences (Linguistic, Logical, Bodily, Spatial, Musical, Interpersonal and Intrapersonal). ALT gives you the opportunity to understand our predominant intelligences and Learning styles and by recommending various tools and techniques to learn using our preferred modes, it facilitates quicker and more effective learning. Using these techniques we can learn in half the time and also ensure total recall at any point of time.

There are lot of good books that teach you speed reading. But I would personally recommend a software called EYEQ. You can get it here……
Speed Reading

Download the software and work on it for a few days and you will find your eyes gobbling up words and paragraphs in a jiffy…..

ALT is also available from multiple sources. But the best one is from the world renowned trainer Brian Tracy. You can purchase a set of 6 or 7 CD’s. You can go through them within a couple of hours and trust me, your life will never be the same again. You can get them here…
ALT

As I have said before, LEARN MORE to EARN MORE and these two sources will help you do just that comfortably…

I expect a Thank you call.

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