Category Archives: A new sunrise

“I am totally confused. Can’t decide between A and B. This impasse is driving me crazy”. This is one of the oft repeated complaints from people who come seeking help from us. And we totally understand. Unresolved issues put your mind at cross roads and this can subject you to tremendous amounts of stress. But there are easy ways out.

I believe that though you could have multiple ardent arguments going on inside you, your subconscious mind knows the best course to take. One just have to silence the conflicting views and listen to the wise inner voice. Let me share with you three tools to draw Mr. inner voice out. One post at a time.

This is one of the most effective NLP techniques and it is aptly titled Visual Squash. Lets play…..

Sit down and relax. Make sure that you wouldn’t be disturbed for 10- 15 minutes.

Extend both your hands out in front of you and make your palms face each other.

Give a size, color and shape to option A and imagine that it is on your left palm… for e.g., if it’s about relocating to another country, say Paris, Imagine that you have Eiffel tower in the palm of your hand. Don’t try too hard. Just zero in on anything that comes to your mind.

Repeat for Option B. e.g.- Staying back in Dubai (Could be the Burj). Place it on your other palm.

Now with these two “Things” facing each other, make them compliment one another by appreciating each other for the benefits they would bring you . For e.g. Burj tells Eiffel– you will give “Ibrahim” more exposure to international markets, You will give him better living standards, higher salaries… and Eiffel replies– You will give “Ibrahim” a familiar place, peace of mind, nearness to his relatives, closeness to his values etc…..

Keep going…. Freak out……..Only compliments, mind you.

As you keep going, you will realize that your palms are coming together. Let them.

Finally your palms will meet. Once this happens, imagine Burj and Eiffel fusing together and pouring out of your palms as sparkling fireworks with lots of color and sound.

Thats it. Get up…… You would have had your decision by now

By using this method, your are allowing your mind to freely explore the pros of both the options without fear or prejudice. Each compliment mentioned, will stir something within you and your feelings and thoughts will present their respective cases to you… and your wise Inner voice will make a well informed decision.

Two more tools, in my subsequent blogs… till then Happy New year. If you need any more assistance, call me on 050 3423552.

Thank god, the citizens of India have finally come together to combat Corruption– the “C” that has been draining this great country of its potential to reach the very top. India is the 11th largest economy in the world and the 4th largest by purchasing power parity . If we can sustain the current growth of 9%, average income is expected to double in a few years and we are stated to be the 3rd largest economy very soon. However latest statistics show that the total money scrupulous elements have made through corruption over the years is USD 20.23 trillion. With this amount, we could have defeated most of our social problems like unemployment and poverty and we would have occupied our destined position in the international community much sooner.

Hope the current enthusiasm and excitement doesn’t die down and hope it will lead to some stringent and effective regulations that will help us eradicate this malaise, once and for all.

This said, we also urgently need a movement to combat the other “C” which also has the potential to put brakes on our ascent towards success. This is the “C” that can undo all the progress that we made till date and push us back into a un mountable death spiral of mayhem and chaos.

This “C” stands for Communalism…..

Steven Wilkinson, a US based Scholar who has been studying communal violence in India has concluded that since independence, the casualties in communal riots in India is as huge as 40,000. Bring the partition into this equation and the figure stands at 1.5 million – We have managed to kill many more of our own than what our enemies have. And by doing so, We have been doing a huge favor to all the ones who are desperate to destabilize us and see our doom.

The sad fact is that our Police force is fully equipped and capable of brining any riot under control within 24 hours. The major communal riots that cause higher casualties are pre-planned for days if not months and there are always early warnings of such a planning which the police and intelligence can easily know if they care. Hence it is obvious that all these riots that destroy our valuable human resources, our brand image and the precious climate of peace and co operation are successful only due to the nexus between riot entrepreneurs, politicians, enforcement agencies and the media.

About 31 Inquiry Commissions were appointed after various communal riots. These Inquiry Commissions have pointed out that riots take place as administration is complicit and fail to perform their duties on all three fronts – in taking preventive steps before riots, controlling the mobs during the riots and finally bringing the culprits to book.

Hatred, fear and communalism will not help our country. Neither numbers or mob strength will help any particular community. At the ease at which bombs can be made and explosions can be triggered, one single fanatic can kill hundreds. See what is happening to our neighbors. Their economy is in shambles. No one wants to invest there and the whole nation is staring at a bleak future. Let us not allow anyone to lead us to the same state. And let us hope that our neighbors also get cured at the earliest.

How can we, commoners come together to defeat this nexus ?

How can we coerce ourselves to forget the wounds of the past?

How can we refrain from spreading doubt, fear and hatred?

How can we stop ourselves from being infuriated by the riot mongers?

How can we remind ourselves that our future is more important than our past?

How can we together create an atmosphere conducive for growth and development?

How can we combat the second “C”?

Any ideas?, Any Anna’s ?

Back home, the dreaded police department has a simple and straight forward way of solving even the toughest of crimes. They maintain a database of citizens picked up earlier for petty offenses. Whenever law breaking happens, they scout around for some time. If the offenders evade them, VOILA! Out comes the list and some hapless soul is dragged to jail. One more case is solved and the stakeholders bask in the glory of received accolades. And of course, the police have some very creative ways to make these “convicts” confess to these crimes… local imitations of water boarding, electrocution and flogging…. to name a few. I still smile when I think of a old joke which had a couple of police men torturing a bear, trying to make it confess- that it was the infamous tiger that had been venturing on manhunts.

It’s very much like the drunk who was found searching desperately under a lamp post. When enquired, he said that he was searching for his lost bunch of keys. Upon asked whether he had lost the keys at that exact spot, he replied “I lost them somewhere else, but its dark there and well lit here”. One cant but envy those desperadoes who can merrily go scot free after each crime, since the blame will invariably fall on someone else by default. Do anything wicked and forget about it. Someone somewhere will pay for their sins…perfect arrangement.

After the recent bombings in Norway, all the news channels and newspapers were quoting police and intelligence sources unanimously and unequivocally stating that the perpetrators had to be Islamic fundamentalists. They were at the verge of cracking the case and the media was indulging in bouts of verbal diarrhea, explaining Islam’s inclination towards violence and the sinister cold bloodedness of Muslims. Finally it turned out that the man accused of the killing spree was an Islamophobe, deeply influenced by a group of American bloggers and writers who over the years have been desperately trying to “defend the west from Islamic domination”. He was one of the most vociferous supporters of the “Grave danger posed by Muslim immigrants to Western culture” cause.

Thank god Justice prevailed in Norway. And hope it will be repeated in the case of thousands of innocents languishing in jail for crimes they have never committed.
Hope our law enforcers will reexamine and change their paradigms and refrain from jumping into pre conceived conclusions. Hope the Muslim community will work proactively to cleanse itself of the stigma attached to it. Hope it will locate and alienate the few black sheep who believe that killing of innocents will emancipate their brethren from injustice. Those wayward ones who try to serve almighty god by spilling guiltless blood.

And most importantly may the sinister plots of all those ominous invisible hands that are waiting to exploit this situations fail.
May true justice prevail……

Had the opportunity to facilitate a session on “Effective Thinking” recently. Had a bash trying to identify common thinking ailments that plague all of us . With gratitude towards the enlightened and enthusiastic set of learners who gave us lot of inputs, let me present the Viruses of our Mind…

Tsunamising:(Making it Huge!!!!!!!)

You have sent your son out to the Grocery. He isn’t back after 4.5 minutes (your eyes never left the clock). You are worried. After 5 minutes you start panicking….. All the worst possible scenarios flood into your mind.

You have sent an email to a close friend who usually reciprocates promptly. Your inbox has being lying barren for two days. You convince yourself that your friend is upset with you and has sworn never to correspond with you. It’s all over…. For now and ever.

That fever that you got recently is definetely a symptom of You know what. Doctors have confirmed otherwise. Buy you know for sure!!!!!

Perfect 10 or none: (It should be Perfect or it shouldn’t be at all)

You want to pray 5 times a day. You missed one. You decide that everything is lost and skip the other ones as well.

You are on a diet and decide to stay away from sweets for dear life. But on a hapless day you have a bite of a very appealing doughnut… and gone. You decide that your diet lies in tatters and you go on to finish the whole box.

You have a small argument with your loved one and lose your cool. That’s it. You decide that the relationship is over and can never be normal again because all relationships have to be perfect.

Nostradamus: (Future telling)

You have been invited for a family get together. You are all set to go. But you see pictures of people making fun of you. That irritating aunt will definitely cold shoulder you. You will end up prodded and poked from all sides. They will all make fun of you………. You can predict the horrendous future perfectly.

You have a presentation to give tomorrow. You are sure that people will be bored. You will get stuck. People will ask questions that will stump you. Your show will be a disaster.

Color Blind (I see only what I want to see)

You decide that Mr. A is against you. You will not see or hear anything good that the person does to you or says good about you. Your antennae will pick up only the not so good things that he has to say or do.

You decide that your husband always stamps the exquisite carpets with his dirty shoes. You don’t notice the million times when he stayed away from it. You catch him red handed (or red legged) only when he is all over the carpet.
 
Tyrant (There are rules for everything…. they must be followed)

People should respond to me the way I treat them. My son should keep the books the way I want them to be kept. Neighbours shouldn’t have parties. I should always be nice and kind. Husbands shouldn’t disagree with wives in front of kids… You shouldn’t go out for dinner more than once a week……

General (Over Generalizing and all knowing- without any doubt)

Nobody loves me…. All Americans are like this. All children are thankless. Are XX nationalities are like that. I can never do presentations right. I always mess up things. I am hopeless……

Mind Reader (I know why they behave this way)

Mr. X didn’t say hi because he is too proud. Ms. B is not talking to me because Ms. C would have gossiped about me. Mr. H is not helping because he feels threatened. My son doesn’t learn because he is lazy. My wife doesn’t appreciate because she is thankless. Because they have a very poor background, they behave that way………

No Thanks (I am not good)

Someone compliments your looks and you feel-“They are saying that to please me. I am really up to no good”. Someone appreciates a dish that you made and you feel- “The dish is horrible. They are saying that to boost my self esteem”

If you regularly suffer from any of these ailments…. Return to this blog soon. We may have an antidote!!!!!

With the rapidity of the tsunami that ruthlessly swept across Japan, or the briskness of Osama Bin Laden’s burial at sea (according to Islamic rights) or the fleetness of the waves of protests sweeping across the Middle East, the better (or bitter) half of 2011 has already passed us by. So it would be a grand time to reflect back on the magnificent goals that we had all set either in those dusky evenings of 2010 or in those wee hours of 2011.

If you were among the privileged few who didn’t have any Goals for the year 2011… that’s fine. Please go ahead and celebrate. If you didn’t have anywhere to go, any road will take you there. So Congrats! And may you keep winning year after year.

Hope my sarcasm doesn’t trickle down to this paragraph. This is for the focused ones. All those of you who had goals with clear milestones and have reached where you wanted to… Super Mabrook. You are in that exclusive 3% of the world who set goals and really manage to get them. We would love to hear your success stories. Go ahead, blow your bugles. We will post them on this blog. If professional goals have also been humbled, you can use this opportunity to let your bosses know about your indispensability. Just a tiny doubt….. Were your goals really challenging ones? Did they stretch you well enough? Did you experience that overwhelming feeling of actualization and achievement when you realized it? Did you feel proud of the rungs conquered and heights achieved? If yes, then super duper mabrook. The problem with most of us is not that we set high goals and fail to reach them, but is that we set such low goals and achieve them tooooooooooooo easily. Hope you are exceptions to this.

For all those who had set goals and failed to achieve them…. Let us do some introspection together. Let us help each other to learn the reasons why goals are so often abandoned by the waysides of life.

Please choose the apt reason by clicking the link below. Thanks in Advance. Do share this link with your friends (Let us be better informed before we prescribe antidotes…)

CLICK LINK BELOW

Didnt realise my goals because….
(polls)