I dont know Sweetheart

My wife came to me as I was cozily drifting into my Saturday slumber, drawn out on the comfortable living room sofa. She had the list of the Top news stories of the 21st century complied by the Global Language Monitor. The curious lady had questions about every one of them to her well informed and authoritatively opinionated better half.

Fortunately I had answers for every single question- the same one…

News item number 1: The Rise of China

Question: “How can someone be a communist and hyper-capitalist at the same time. Aren’t they mutually exclusive?”

News item number 2: Election of Barack Obama

Question: “How could the whole world (even you ) be foolish enough to unanimously dream that any president would actually bring changes to US policies?”

News item number 3: Death of Osama Bin Laden

Question: “How could some Muslims support Osama Bin Laden when he is said to have killed innocent men, women and children?”

Another one on the same item

Question: “They said that Saddam Hussein was captured in December. But as he was being dragged out of the fox hole, we could see date palms laden with ripe fruit (which ripens only in summer) in the background. And then you have the WMD story. They have lost their credibility. So how can we trust the same guys now?”

News item number 4: Wiki leaks

Question: “The Swedish Prosecution Authority had dropped the warrant for Assange a few hours after his previous arrest. Then why was he arrested again. That too after his site was taken off from one server after the other on instructions given by the US Government?”

News item number 5: British Royal Wedding

Question: “Why is the world going Gaga over the wedding of a man from a tiny island whose Great Grand Father once brutally ruled most of the world ?”

News item number 6: Death of Michael Jackson

Question: “All the child molestation charges against him were dropped because he gave the parents truckloads of money. Does this make him guilty or innocent ?”

News item number 7: Sept 11, 2001 attacks on the United States

Question: “Who really did this?”

News item number 8: Japanese Tsunami

Question: “Even after all these years of scientific progress, are we so helpless against the forces of nature ?”

News item number 9: Arab Spring uprisings

Question: “Don’t these leaders who used brutal force against their own people fear god and the judgment day ?”

News item number 10: Global economic meltdown

Question: “Will you get your bonus this year ?”

My consistent answer was “I don’t know, sweetheart”.